How to Ask Your Spouse for a Divorce.
When two people are married, they typically move in together and start sharing domestic responsibilities, such as deciding what to have for dinner and whose turn it is to take care of the family pet. Perhaps your spouse is your financial partner in the sense that you both own joint accounts or that they have a will in both of your names. However, if you have been married for more than two years without divorcing, at least one of the states in the union has passed the cutoff for you to be able to get an annulment instead – and not just any annulment, either. If you meet these requirements, you will be able to get an annulment if you have been married for more than two years without divorcing.
You must first get an annulment, which renders your marriage legally null, in order to be eligible for a divorce in the majority of states. It is a little-known truth that when it comes time to divide assets and figure out how much alimony to pay, certain jurisdictions may even attribute a higher value to an annulment over a common-law marriage. This is something that you should be aware of. How exactly do you approach the topic of divorce with your partner?
The following are six suggestions on how to tackle this touchy subject with diplomacy and self-assurance.
Discuss it in depth to start.
When you start making plans for a divorce, you are simultaneously making plans for your ultimate departure from the marriage you are currently in. And despite the fact that getting a divorce might seem invigorating and exhilarating, it’s not a choice that should be taken lightly at any point in your life. It’s true that you feel bitter and furious, but you could also feel guilty about wanting to get out of a marriage that’s headed in the wrong direction. It’s possible that you still have feelings for your ex-spouse, and you don’t want to do anything that might make them feel bad.
Before attempting to come up with a solution on your own, it is essential to discuss the problem with a reliable friend or colleague. Someone who cares about you may point out certain things to you that you need to be aware of, even if it’s possible that you don’t yet know whether or not your spouse is the perfect person for you.
Make sure that your reasons for desiring a divorce are very apparent.
People frequently state that they desire a divorce because they are sick of their marriage or because they have stopped loving their partner for one reason or another. It’s possible that these things are accurate, but they might also be signs of a more significant issue. You are setting yourself up for failure if the reasons you desire a divorce are clouded by sentiments of anger or a lingering sense of what you didn’t get out of your marriage. If this is the case, you are setting yourself up for failure.
You need to have a crystal clear idea right from the beginning of what you want to receive out of the divorce, as well as what you want the divorce to achieve. Make sure you are as descriptive as you can. This can assist you in avoiding misunderstandings along the road, and if you are still hesitant, you can always revisit the topic at a later time.
Don’t count on getting anything in return.
Because annulments are irreversible, governments tend to place a higher value on them compared to common-law marriages. This is one of the reasons why states would pay more value for an annulment. When you acquire an annulment, you lose the right to ever re-file for a divorce, regardless of how much you might wish to do so in the future. However, despite the fact that this is not what one would anticipate from a common-law marriage, the law requires it.
You are seeking a divorce in the state of California and not in the state of Nevada if you do not first obtain an annulment before making your request for a divorce in any state. Although you are unable to file for divorce in Nevada, the laws of your home state may be able to help you resolve the challenges you are facing. If you believe this is unjust and desire a divorce in both jurisdictions, you can file for divorce in Nevada and argue for a change in the laws of both states.
Don’t ask for too little or too much; just get the right amount.
This is especially important to keep in mind if you want to pursue an annulment of the marriage. There is a delicate line that separates asking the court for a little bit too much from asking the court for a bit too little. In situations of annulment, just like in cases of divorce, the court determines how much you are entitled to based on what you would have made in alimony and property split if you had never been married.
This is done in order to fairly distribute the assets. You don’t want to make this sum so high that your partner won’t be able to pay it, and you also don’t want to set it so low that you won’t receive anything in return for your efforts. Always bear in mind that you’re aiming for the highest possible score when you’re negotiating the conditions of your divorce. You want to leave with something, even if you don’t believe that you deserve it, and you want to leave with anything.
Establish unambiguous goals with regard to child custody and financial support.
When you get a divorce, it’s like walking into a complete stranger’s house armed with a hammer and shingle. The procedure for getting a divorce can be extremely difficult and agonizing, and there is no assurance that the judge will find in your favor. Even if they do, you still run the risk of receiving child custody and alimony arrangements that are less than 50/50, as well as the possibility of losing your house and all else you’ve fought for. Even if you are 100 percent positive that going through with a divorce is the best option for you, it is still a smart idea to establish some ground rules for yourself.
For instance, you should determine in advance how you will make decisions on child custody and child support, as well as who will make those decisions and how much time you will have to make that choice. You have much more time to make these judgments and think things over if you are attempting to get a divorce in a state that demands an annulment as a prerequisite to getting a divorce.
The bottom line is that no one should ever get married only because they want a piece of paper in their hands; yet, if you do get married for this reason, you shouldn’t hurry into a divorce unless you have first given it some careful consideration. It is vital to talk it over with someone you can trust, and it is important to make clear expectations on what it is you want out of a divorce.
Both of these things are crucial. You do not want to put yourself in a position where you will be taken aback by the decision that is handed down by the divorce court at the end of the day.